Wrighty, Wrighty, Wrighty ... what an Otago man

Roy Colbert

March 27, 2001

(Two cricket fanatics with their views on the game from their Dunedin sofa).

"John Wright, mate. I'll say it again, John Wright."

"John Wright, man of the hour, man of the YEAR, mate."

"Man of the MILLENIUM, mate. Do you realise how hard it is to coach India?"

"I realise that, yes. Wrighty realised that too. But he put his head down and did the business, as any former Otago boy would."

"I remember Wrighty when he came down here from the lush farmlands of Canterbury..."

"Turnip protruding from each ear."

"... turnip protruding from each ear as you say. Talk about a blank canvas, mate. But the Otago University palette is rich with many colours, and the painters we have made a man of the boy, and sent him back to Darfield a world-class batsman and, dare I say it, a phenomenal thinker on the game."

"I'll never forget his first club game for University. He came out with just the one pad - on the wrong leg! He scored 112. I knew then we were in the presence of greatness."

"I used to play croquet with Wrighty when he was here. We'd have a few, quite a few actually, and then go up to the Punga green in Ross St around midnight. We often played till dawn."

"He loves the good life does Wrighty."

"That he does. Like many superior thinkers on the game before him, Wrighty felt all the secrets of batting were contained in the techniques endemic to top-line croquet. Those who saw Wrighty's first test innings at the Basin will know what I'm talking about here. Tactically, he played croquet like a cunning dog too.

Always dropped the first game. Then he'd win the next two. He did it every time and I always fell for it. Though when it's the middle of the night and you're off your face, you fall for most things."

"Australia fell for it too, mate. Wrighty the old croquet hustler. What a great quote after Australia butchered them in the first test -'they're not that good'. Classic hustler line. And Australia fell for it lock, stock and two smoking barrels."

"As they generally do whenever intellect is brought into play, mate, let's be brutally fair."

"Some interesting stats from that series, mate. Shayne Warne - going for 50 runs a wicket on perfect spinners' tracks. Questions will have to be asked."

"Indeed. Especially when his opposite number Harbhajan Singh takes 32 for next to nothing."

"But Harbhajan Singh was guided by Wrighty, mate, that was the difference."

"And Ricky Ponting - 17 runs at 3.4, dismissed five times by Singh. Questions will have to be asked."

"Ponting described his series on the Indian CricInfo site as 'torture by spin' which I thought was remarkably lucid for an Australian."

"Remarkably so, yes. Have you ever heard Wrighty sing?"

"Many times, mate. He sings like a bellbird. And plays a delightful guitar. He's very Bob Dylan."

"I see India are refusing to play Pakistan."

"Well, the way Pakistan batted against us in Hamilton on Tuesday morning, they're lucky to have Test match status."

"Coney called it, mate - 'a curious curious innings'. It was definitely that. You know what I would do with this Pakistan side? I'd have them coached by Wrighty."

"You'd make Wrighty leave India?"

"No, I'd have him coach India as well. They're not playing each other so there's no problem. I'd also have him coaching New Zealand. But I'd draw the line at three, Wrighty's only human after all."

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